ÿWPC™ 2Al¨6Ó~–26­—26vu8•I@«Ó. Ìñ×Q$!}ë»Ù°¥ÿ01º±×çV­ @¤ŽáƒÇbSù?ô)@ˆ¸1¿°ˆ«ÀÝëE­xìœ ÎÉø~“ÜfÇÚúD¨ûrjê9"÷½ÐO'%ï{M¤™?šƒN§Š¿¯šKïráJ½…ÎÏEÄ8u¹ű5T/̧åC_C¡&ù‹7PôN—B2ß#Ñäþ—š³(zÜhcÏ(ªî060àm’—CÙ t’a<†EË: òÛG6”0w6Í™=Þ‰œ ÄWÿcÙAEHVä8îêçL3ŽYÒ{iäKe‰Ù9•†Ì8Ò‘ÃãæÞêgÊí§ iÆp[r®T•¯ä¦^yø£ïøthº9D|Ð9ÍÚXÒ©z ¼€ŒŠ …#¦Ȭ9"ù¹ÊÓ¼GñLÁ'¥ÿ‚d\=5ž‰©ÚJ…ìézF¬¶aÒ*·;Æ«ê<Ø8Ë 0ÜfN—KT—tO2HÓJ¹Ò\{ÖÌÍ%ELŠæÎþ³ð[Ú^ÿÒM’U¡ä åR©e“€õS§r*Èjš ¼àº¼J˜»õ*Í'žÀãMœYïB~°[z8ÃIó.c¹4êb4´5 #ɶU N %Í 0:ÓU> ^ KwW4[o~ m€N—˜Canon Bubble-Jet BJC-2100Q/00/Q0(  Z‹6Times New Roman RegularX(üœ$¡¡ÔUSUS.,Ôô\  `‹&Times New Roman¯.K6é R_5ê:i¢×+003|xÿU‹ÿÀÀÀÝ ƒüœ!ÝÔUSUS.,ÔÝ  ÝÔ‡XÀäXXXÔÔESUS.,Ôà  àà ` àà ¸ àà  à€€€€€€€€€€€€òòFamily€Reunionóó€€Ð ° Ðà  àÌÓÓà  àLet€me€start€by€saying€this:€I€had€no€choice€but€to€leave€that€night.€I€never€was€much€of€aÐ ŠÚ Ðfamily€man.€I€mean,€I€gave€it€my€all,€but€Iððm€sure€I€would€have€been€better€at€it€if€I€would€haveÐ d´ Ðhad€the€better€fortune€to€have€been€with€someone€other€than€Loretta.€She€wasnððt€exactly€aÐ > Ž Ðsweetheart€after€I€ruined€her€life.€We€both€had€different€plans€for€our€lives€but€things€donððtÐ  h Ðalways€end€up€the€way€we€plan€them.€I€know€this€now.€I€didnððt€think€I€would€ever€take€this€flightÐ ò B  Ðto€California€for€this€kind€of€reunion.Ð Ì  Ðà  àWhen€I€walked€out€of€Lorettaððs€life€I€had€no€intention€of€never€coming€back.€I€was€fed€upÐ ¦ö  Ðwith€her,€and€she€of€me€and€we€couldnððt€take€anymore€of€each€other.€But€I€didnððt€want,€orÐ €Ð Ðexpect,€€things€to€go€the€way€they€did.€We€were€married€too€young€and€had€our€daughter€JulieÐ Zª Ðtoo€young.€With€all€the€trappings€of€being€parents€at€a€time€we€didnððt€want€to€be€parents,€and€she€Ð 4„ Ðwith€someone€she€didnððt€want€to€be€a€parent€with.€It€was€too€much€to€handle.€Back€in€those€daysÐ ^ Ða€man€married€the€mother€of€his€child€for€better€or€worse,€sometimes€for€the€better,€sometimesÐ è8 Ðfor€the€worse.€Loretta€was€a€cold€woman€who€blamed€me€for€messing€up€her€life,€and€she€neverÐ Â Ðlet€me€forget€it.€In€fact,€she€made€sure€I€could€never€forgot.€Ð œì Ðà  àLoretta€was€a€business€major€at€a€time€when€fewer€women€were€going€to€college€than€areÐ v Æ Ðtoday.€She€was€driven,€intelligent,€and€stunningly€beautiful.€She€was€going€to€be€successful€andÐ P"   Ðwas€attracted€to€men€who€she€knew€were€going€to€be€there€at€the€top€with€her,€who€could€handleÐ *$z" Ðher€intelligence€and€confidence.€I€had€a€football€scholarship€from€Ohio€State€University€as€aÐ &T!$ Ðmiddle€linebacker,€and€was€doing€well€in€school,€majoring€in€engineering.€I€had€a€3.9€gradeÐ Þ'.#& Ðpoint€average,€andÔ#†XÀäXXXÀä-#ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔUS.,ES.,LÔÔESUS.,Ô€I€was€an€All„State€football€player.€My€junior€year€we€had€a€class€together,€andÐ ¸)%( ÐI€heard€her€speak€out€to€the€professor€when€he€said€something€she€didnððt€like.€The€professorÐ ’+â&* ÐlÔ_Ôambasted€her€for€her€opinion,€but€she€stood€her€ground.€She€was€beautiful€in€her€fury.€She€was€Ð l-¼(, Їà  àà ` àà ¸ àà  àà h àà À àà  àà p àà È àà  àà x àà Ð à€€€€€€€€€€2Ìstrong€willed€and€stubborn,€not€at€all€as€delicate€as€many€of€the€girls€on€campus.€I€fell€instantlyÐ ŠÚ Ðin€love.€Ð d´ Ðà  àOur€courtship€was€a€whirlwind.€We€were€inseparable,€but€she€always€seemed€to€have€anÐ > Ž Ðinvisible€distance€to€her.€We€often€studied€in€each€otherððs€presence,€but€not€together€because€ourÐ  h Ðmajors€were€different.€Afterwards€we€would€make€love€like€there€was€no€distance,€but€it€wouldÐ ò B  Ðbe€there€again€once€the€afterglow€wore€off.€€€€Ð Ì  Ðà  àOnce€she€found€out€she€was€pregnant€she€was€so€ashamed€that€she€left€school.€This€wasÐ ¦ö  Ðin€the€late€1940's,€mind€you,€and€things€were€much€different€then.€Sheððd€had€grandiose€plans€forÐ €Ð Ðher€future,€and€was€well€on€her€way€to€achieving€them.€She€believed€that€I€took€these€plans€awayÐ Zª Ðfrom€her.€Ô#†XÀäXXXÀäw #ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔUS.,ES.,° ÔÔESUS.,ÔShe€fully€expected€me€to€go€with€her€and€marry€her.€Make€her€a€proper€woman.€HowÐ 4„ Ðcould€I€have€refused?€I€dropped€out€of€college€and€we€moved€to€a€nice€little€suburb€outside€ofÐ ^ ÐChicago,€where€I€took€a€job€as€a€manager€at€a€railroad€depot€machine€shopÔ#†XÀäXXXÀäˆ#ÔÔUS.,ES.,ÁÔÔESUS.,ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔ.€Loretta€became€aÐ è8 Ðhousewife€and€mother.€The€worst€nightmare€of€a€power„hungry€aspiring€businesswoman.€Ð  Ðà  àOver€the€next€few€years€things€became€more€and€more€icy€and€distant€between€us.€WeÐ œì Ðstill€made€love,€but€it€was€mechanical€and€disconnected.€Our€bodies€required€the€touch€andÐ v Æ Ðpleasure,€but€her€heart€abhorred€that€need.€Ô#†XÀäXXXÀäC#ÔÔUS.,ES.,1ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔESUS.,ÔWe€functioned€as€a€two€party€coalition€to€raise€aÐ P"   Ðdaughter€but€there€was€no€marriage€there€in€the€traditional€sense.€Just€two€people€bonded€by€one€Ð *$z" Ðcommon€love:€our€daughter.€She€was€no€longer€in€love€with€me.€I€could€feel€it€in€herÐ &T!$ Ðindifference€to€my€attempts€to€rekindle€those€emotions€that€had€originally€landed€us€in€theÐ Þ'.#& Ðshared€life€that€no€longer€brought€her€the€happiness€it€once€had.€She€tried€twice€to€go€back€toÐ ¸)%( Ðschool,€and€twice€she€dropped€out.€I€asked€her€why€she€wouldnððt€stick€with€it€and€she€repliedÐ ’+â&* Ðthat€ð ðit€was€too€late.ððÐ l-¼(, Ðà  àÔ#†XÀäXXXÀä=#ÔÔUS.,ES.,\ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔESUS.,Ôà ` àà ¸ àà  àà h àà À àà  àà p àà È àà  àà x àà Ð à€€€€€€€€€€3€Ð ° Ðà  àOnce€Julie€was€in€grammar€school€Loretta€began€working€as€a€secretary€at€a€departmentÐ ŠÚ Ðstore€in€town.€She€never€talked€much€about€her€job€there,€but€I€think€she€was€miserable€in€it.€SheÐ d´ Ðwas€supposed€to€be€running€a€place€like€that€by€now,€and€probably€would€have€been€if€she€wouldÐ > Ž Ðhave€finished€her€last€two€years€at€the€university.€When€I€would€ask€her€how€her€day€had€wentÐ  h Ðshe€would€look€at€me€coldly€and€I€felt€the€accusatory€undertones.€Her€personality€had€graduallyÐ ò B  Ðchanged€over€the€years€but€I€had€no€idea€what€she€was€capable€of.€My€god,€why€would€I€have€leftÐ Ì  Ðhad€I€known?€Ð ¦ö  Ðà  àThe€night€I€left€I€did€so€because€she€told€me€she€was€leaving€me€and€taking€Julie.€SheÐ €Ð Ðsaid€she€could€no€longer€live€under€the€same€roof€as€me.€She€couldnððt€stand€looking€at€meÐ Zª Ðanymore.€She€didnððt€know€where€she€was€going€but€she€planned€to€pack€her€stuff€and€take€JulieÐ 4„ Ðwith€her.€She€was€serious.€I€knew€from€5€years€of€being€married€to€her€she€wasnððt€kidding,€so€IÐ ^ Ðleft€so€that€she€and€Julie€could€have€the€house.€The€house€had€been€paid€for€with€the€help€of€aÐ è8 Ðsmall€inheritance€given€to€her€by€her€late,€modestly€rich€uncle.€Ô#†XÀäXXXÀäg#ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔUS.,ES.,†ÔÔESUS.,ÔI€reluctantly€packed€my€bags€andÐ Â Ðleft€in€my€truck.€Three€weeks€later€the€place€was€a€smoldering€pile€of€rubble.Ð œì Ðà  àI€stayed€with€my€pal€Eddie€for€a€few€weeks€trying€to€figure€out€what€I€was€going€to€do.€IÐ v Æ Ðsaw€Julie€a€few€times€in€the€mornings€when€I€would€come€and€pick€her€up€for€school,€and€theÐ P"   Ðlast€time€I€saw€her€was€the€evening€we€went€to€the€county€fair€and€ate€corn€dogs€and€rode€theÐ *$z" Ðrides€at€the€midway.€She€hugged€me€goodbye€and€told€me€she€loved€me.€I€took€her€to€the€frontÐ &T!$ Ðdoor€and€Loretta€was€standing€inside€watching€me€silently.€She€asked€me€through€the€screenÐ Þ'.#& Ðdoor€if€I€had€said€goodbye€to€my€daughter.€I€didnððt€know€what€she€meant€then.€I€went€back€toÐ ¸)%( ÐEddieððs€and€went€to€sleep€on€the€couch€that€was€to€be€mine€until€I€got€my€own€apartment.€EddieÐ ’+â&* Ðwas€a€volunteer€firefighter€at€that€time€and€I€awoke€to€him€shaking€me€out€of€sleep€to€tell€me€my€Ð l-¼(, Їà  àà ` àà ¸ àà  àà h àà À àà  àà p àà È àà  àà x àà Ð à€€€€€€€€€€4Ð ° Ðhouse€was€on€fire.€He€had€gotten€the€call€a€few€minutes€prior€and€was€on€his€way€to€the€blaze.€IÐ ŠÚ Ðleapt€out€of€bed,€threw€on€my€clothes€and€rushed€to€the€scene.€The€police€officers€wouldnððtÐ d´ Ðallow€me€to€get€close€to€the€house,€stopping€me€a€block€back€for€safety€reasons€while€the€fireÐ > Ž Ðfighters€fought€the€blaze.€I€stayed€there€all€night€until€I€got€word€that€there€were€two€bodiesÐ  h Ðfound€inside.€I€fainted€there€on€the€sidewalk€because€I€remember€everything€went€black.Ð ò B  Ðà  àThe€bodies€were€of€a€woman€and€a€young€girl€and€it€was€an€open€and€shut€case.€Ô#†XÀäXXXÀäÅ#ÔÔ‡XÀäXXXÀäÔÔUS.,ES.,þÔÔESUS.,ÔBack€inÐ Ì  Ðthose€days€there€werenððt€any€CSI€units€like€there€are€today.€The€fire€marshall€determined€that€theÐ ¦ö  Ðblaze€was€set€intentionally€with€kerosene.€The€authorities€could€find€no€evidence€that€there€wasÐ €Ð Ðany€other€foul€play€involved€such€as€a€break„in,€and€ruled€it€a€murder„suicide.€This€type€of€thingÐ Zª Ðwasnððt€as€common€back€then,€but€even€then,€stranger€things€had€happened.€I€did€what€any€manÐ 4„ Ðwould€do€in€that€situation.€I€planned€and€attended€the€combined€funeral€of€my€wife€andÐ ^ Ðdaughter.€I€put€in€a€transfer€at€my€job€and€moved€to€Florida€to€work€at€a€railway€station€outsideÐ è8 Ðof€Tallahassee.€I€left€Illinois€and€never€went€back.€Ð  Ðà  àI€looked€back€often€though,€in€my€mindððs€eye.€Memories€are€funny€things€sometimes,Ð œì Ðsome€of€them€seem€to€always€be€right€behind€you,€especially€the€bad€ones.€I€always€regrettedÐ v Æ Ðleaving€the€house€that€day.€That€guilt€seemed€to€wear€on€me€with€the€full€weight€of€the€past.€AÐ P"   Ðpast€that€seemed€to€be€summed€up€by€that€same€guilt.Ð *$z" Ðà  à€But€I€moved€on€with€my€life€because€thatððs€all€we€can€do€as€humans;€keep€going.€IÐ &T!$ Ðeventually€remarried€12€years€later€but€never€had€any€more€children€because€my€second€wifeÐ Þ'.#& ÐKathryn€was€barren€from€the€ovarian€cancer€that€eventually€killed€her,€10€years€ago.€I€neverÐ ¸)%( Ðforgot€my€first€wife€Loretta,€or€my€daughter€Julie.€Then€a€week€ago€I€got€a€surprising€phone€callÐ ’+â&* Ðthat€damn€near€killed€me,€damn€near€stopped€my€heart,€and€is€why€Iððm€now€sitting€on€this€jet€Ð l-¼(, Їà  àà ` àà ¸ àà  àà h àà À àà  àà p àà È àà  àà x àà Ð à€€€€€€€€€€5Ð ° Ðwhile€itððs€waiting€to€be€cleared€for€take€off.€I€got€a€phone€call€from€my€daughter€Julie.Ð ŠÚ Ðà  àJulie€was€now€named€Penny€and€had€spent€the€rest€of€her€childhood€growing€up€inÐ d´ ÐCalifornia.€There€was€a€transient€enough€culture€in€the€San€Francisco€Bay€area€that€Loretta€couldÐ > Ž Ðblend€in€without€too€many€questions.€Loretta€had€moved€them€there€and€their€names€had€beenÐ  h Ðchanged.€Julie€didnððt€tell€me€what€Loretta€changed€her€name€to€and€I€donððt€care.€Over€the€yearsÐ ò B  ÐJulie,€aka€Penny,€had€asked€about€her€father€but€was€always€told€that€I€had€left€them€and€neverÐ Ì  Ðcame€back,€that€I€didnððt€care€about€her€and€she€should€just€forget€about€me.€Julie€doesnððtÐ ¦ö  Ðremember€the€fire€but€says€she€remembers€her€mother€putting€her€in€a€car€she€had€never€seenÐ €Ð Ðbefore€and€then€driving€for€what€seemed€like€forever.€Julie€disappeared€when€she€was€5€yearsÐ Zª Ðold€and€over€the€years€the€memories€of€me€and€our€lives€had€slowly€faded€into€the€back€of€herÐ 4„ Ðbrain€like€so€many€childhood€memories€do.€They€kind€of€become€foggy€ghosts€weððre€not€sure€ifÐ ^ Ðwe€ever€even€really€saw.€Ð è8 Ðà  àWhen€Loretta€was€on€her€deathbed€she€told€Julie€that€many€years€ago€she€had€gained€theÐ Â Ðtrust€of€a€homeless€woman€and€her€daughter€who€were€living€out€of€their€car€a€couple€towns€overÐ œì Ðwhere€Loretta€sometimes€went€to€the€library€to€check€out€books.€She€would€often€feed€thisÐ v Æ Ðwoman€and€her€daughter€and€one€night€she€poisoned€them.€She€did€this€late€at€night€and€broughtÐ P"   Ðthe€car€home€to€load€a€few€things€into€it€for€the€trip.€She€then€planted€the€bodies€in€the€house,Ð *$z" Ðput€the€sleeping€Julie€in€the€car,€went€back€in€and€set€the€house€on€fire,€and€locked€the€door.€SheÐ &T!$ Ðwanted€to€leave€her€old€life€behind€and€leave€no€trace.€A€ð ðrebirth€by€fireðð€she€called€it.€TheÐ Þ'.#& Ðlocals€in€the€other€town€just€figured€the€homeless€woman€and€her€daughter€moved€on€andÐ ¸)%( Ðnothing€was€reported.€They€were€like€ghosts€themselves.€Loretta€told€Julie€my€full€name€and€toldÐ ’+â&* Ðher€she€should€find€me.€It€was€some€kind€of€last€minute€attonement€for€her€sins.€Julie€was€Ð l-¼(, Їà  àà ` àà ¸ àà  àà h àà À àà  àà p àà È àà  àà x àà Ð à€€€€€€€€€€6Ð ° Ðfloored€and€immediately€following€Lorettaððs€death€she€began€searching€for€me.€With€the€internetÐ ŠÚ Ðit€wasnððt€too€hard.€She€found€me€in€just€a€few€days€by€using€phone€and€court€records€(I€have€oneÐ d´ Ðassault€conviction€from€years€ago).€She€then€called€me€and€spoke€to€me€for€the€first€time€in€overÐ > Ž Ð45€years.€Ð  h Ðà  àI€booked€the€first€flight€I€could€get€to€California€and€am€now€on€my€way€through€theÐ ò B  Ðfriendly€skies€to€be€reunited€with€my€daughter€again.€In€a€sense€I€feel€as€if€I€am€finally€goingÐ Ì  Ðhome.€Julie€and€I€are€now€strangers€but€are€both€eager€to€get€to€know€each€other.€I€only€hope€sheÐ ¦ö  Ðcan€forgive€me€for€leaving.€Ð €Ð ÐÓÒÓà  à€€€Ð Zª Ðà  àÔ#†XÀäXXXÀä®$#ÔÔUS.,ES.,ç$Ô